Typing Concrete Things

So I've recently realized I have no idea what I'm doing with my life. It's caused a minor existential crisis. I want to do so many amazing things with my life but have no idea how to get there, and I want to go so many places but have no means to get there. I have nowhere to live next fall and have no idea why I'm an art history major or even what I'm doing in Michigan. But as scared out of my mind as I am, it's hard to forget that this is one of the most beautiful times in my life. It's kind of annoying to not be able to forget that when you want to sulk in your worries. Regardless of the unknown, it's so beautiful to have such a blank slate and not be able to fathom the great people I'm going to meet/live with, the designs I'll create, the places I'll see and photograph, the music I'll listen to, the things I'll write, and the clothes I'll wear. But I'm still scared.
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I think she was afraid to love sometimes. I think it scared her. She was the type to like things that were concrete, like the ocean. Something you could point to and know what it is. I think that’s why she always struggled with God. And I think that’s why she also struggled with love. She couldn’t touch it. She couldn’t hold on to it and make sure it never changed. But sometimes it’s those things you can’t touch that you need to hold on to the most.
-Carrie Ryan
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We Found Love - Rihanna

No Specific Reason or Title

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6 months with this kid + 5 days. Hooray.
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A Story Left Untold

I apologize that I haven't updated in awhile, I've been sick. But..I have managed to bake and at least keep my life together. I baked ginger and cardamom scones, chocolate covered candied orange peels, and caramels (with no corn syrup of course). Somehow they all turned out (and are almost gone) despite my depletion of energy. I've also managed to watch movies and discover new music...just as Christmas break should be. Christmas is in a few days. It should be interesting to see if I get my shopping done not to mention wrapping. But who's stressed about it?
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Everyone has a secret they haven’t shared. Everyone has a past no one’s heard about. Everyone has talents that people don’t notice. Everyone has weaknesses hidden inside. Everyone has a story left untold, so never start judging someone thinking you know them back to front. Because the truth is, you probably don’t.
-Goodmorning&Goodnight
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Junk of the Heart (Happy)-The Kooks

Enemy of the Best

I officially finished my design projects today. I'm exhausted, and potentially am coming down with an illness. Most likely from stress and lack of sleep. It feels so good to be one day closer to Christmas despite the fact that I have about 1/2 a person bought for. It's been a lovely day though; very sunny and warm. I find the sun gives me joy. I also watched Melancholia last night. The end caused me to stare at a wall for a solid 15 minutes. Only great movies do that to me. I feel as though it's the same as a good book, when it creates you to view the world in a different light it's a brilliant film.
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You have to decide what your highest priorities are and have the courage – pleasantly, smilingly, nonapologetically – to say ‘no’ to other things. And the way to do that is by having a bigger ‘yes’ burning inside. The enemy of the ‘best’ is often the ‘good.’
-Stephen Cove
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Dilly - Band of Horses

The Worlds Inside People

I burned a lavender and lemon candle last night. It was perfect next to my dried carnations and baby's breath in a jar. I want to read over my break from school, even if it's just one book.
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People say I make strange choices, but they’re not strange for me. My sickness is that I’m fascinated by human behavior, by what’s underneath the surface, by the worlds inside people.
-Johnny Depp
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Bookends - Simon and Garfunkel

Spaces In Togetherness

I swear, I forgot how lovely the sun on the snow was. It's like seeing something for the first time despite the fact that it snows every year. My brother comes home Wednesday and my sister comes home Tuesday. I get to go home today. I finished my final design project last night at 11:00pm after 20+ hours of work on it, I'm actually pretty satisfied with how it turned out.
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But let there be spaces in your togetherness and let the winds of the heavens dance between you. Love one another but make not a bond of love: let it rather be a moving sea between the shores of your souls.
-Kahlil Gibran
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Feel It All Around - Washed Out

Preserving Eccentricity and Narcissism

It snowed for the first time today. I'm so close to being done with all of my work. Designing, printing, studying, and pasting. That will be my weekend and early week.
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Writing down your thoughts is both necessary and harmful. It leads to eccentricity, narcissism, preserves what should be let go. On the other hand, these notes intensify the inner life, which, left unexpressed, slips through your fingers. If only I could find a better kind of journal, humbler, one that would preserve the same thoughts, the same flesh of life, which is worth saving.
-Anna Kamienska
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Live for the Sounds - Brooke Waggoner

Whimsical Responsibility

The semester is almost over. I legitimately have no idea how I did it.
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You must not ever stop being whimsical. And you must not, ever, give anyone else the responsibility for your life.
-Mary Oliver
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7-14 by: Andy McKee

It's Been Awhile

I haven't had much to say as of late nor really much time to say it.
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To love. To be loved. To never forget your own insignificance. To never get used to the unspeakable violence and the vulgar disparity of life around you. To seek joy in the saddest places. To pursue beauty to its lair. To never simplify what is complicated or complicate what is simple. To respect strength, never power. Above all, to watch. To try and understand. To never look away. And never, never, to forget.
-Arundhati Roy
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You can’t choose what stays and what fades away.
-Florence + the Machine
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Down in the Valley-The Head and the Heart